Friday, November 16, 2012

baby boy: 5 months pregnant

Hello Sweet Boy,

What a fun month it's been! We got to see you, an experience which brought your Mama such joy and relief and peace. I wasn't even quite aware of the anxiety I was carrying, way down deep, until I felt that rush of joy in seeing your perfect little body. I was walking in trust that my Father has given me a gift in you, but I've been holding it so loosely, also at times mucking through the swamps of fear. Those early months of your life I was so, so sick, and I didn't know what that meant for you. Yet here you are, perfectly formed and perfectly healthy, a boy who loves to wiggle and dance.

I knitted you a hat this month, a little blue number with soft nubby yarn. I can't wait to see your face and whether you resemble your siblings! Will you look like your brother (your profiles are so similar)? Will you be determined and driven like Maddie or more laid-back like Sam? Will you be born with a full head of dark hair like both of them? So many questions that will require patience.

 19 weeks

Your most active times of the day are late at night, when I sit down to read stories to the kids and when I stretch out on the couch to watch tv and rest. By this point I felt Maddie and Sam mostly on my side, feet tap-dancing away. That happens occasionally with you, but mostly I feel you way down low, tickling and tapping and knocking at the door to the womb: "Hi there! Just reminding you I'm in here, waiting to get out!"

22 weeks

I'm changing your monthly updates to occur on the 16th, your updated due date. I'm milking those two extra days for all they're worth. :) All along I've been shooting for an earlier DD, considering we know precisely your conception date. 

Thanks for rounding out our family. We're so tickled at the thought of meeting you, so grateful for this unexpected yet greatly desired gift. Thanks be to God, who has continued to delight and surprise us. I keep joking that considering our track record of surprise (the pregnancy, the fact you're a boy and not a girl), that I wouldn't be surprised at all if you ended up red-headed and blue-eyed. Anything is possible, sweet boy, with our creative and loving Father.


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